5. Wet wipes are your new best friend.
6. “Don’t touch that” is the phrase of your life. The toilet, the lamp, their privates… All fair game to kids.
7. Someone will inevitably poop in the tub.
8. Someone will inevitably need a 2nd bath after you discover said someone pooped in the tub.
9. Do not be delusional and put your kids to bed late thinking they will sleep in. They will actually be up before daylight to torture you.
10. Everything is always sticky. So sticky. Don’t bother to try to figure out why.
11. Most of the day will be spent screaming at your kids to stop screaming.
12. A toddler can leave a path of destruction anywhere with just 1 cookie. Pretty impressive actually!